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Sister Wives, Blogging Underwear, & Instagram (A Typical Birthday)

You know what makes a perfect breakfast? Leftovers. #TrueStory

Last week I got a tiny cake.

‘Cause my friends are awesome.

And, also, because it’d been a whole year since we’d celebrated my existence.

(I’m alive!)


Yet a tiny cake wasn’t the most awesome gift I received.

Best. Birthday card. Ever.

There was also this card from Lindsey.

She wrote inside it in silver, so the photo didn’t turn out that well, but she promised that if we become sister wives I can be the third.

(Everyone knows that’s the best sister wife to be.)


(‘Cause you don’t want to be alone with the man and you don’t want to be the wedge.)

(Really, it’s as if you guys haven’t devoted hours and hours of your life to watching a reality TV series on this very subject.)

(Better time management people.)

One of my best birthday presents - can you tell the awesomeness awaiting inside?

I opened a tiny black box to find this present from Anna.

It’s by far the best thing she’s ever given me.

Not including, of course, the promise of her first child.

(I’m the Rumpelstiltskin of my group of friends.)

(Shockingly, my computer doesn’t know how to correctly spell Rumpelstiltskin.)

(I knew things would fall apart after Jobs left.)

My friends are fabulous. Obviously. #HappyBirthdayToMe

If blog-themed underwear doesn’t say “I’m thrilled you’re still alive,” I just don’t know what does.

Underwear presents are the best

They’re up there with private islands or smoothies,


p.s. If you’re wondering what my mom bought me, it was a smart phone.

No longer shall I be shamed by the ignorant phones of my past.

And I’ve also now become addicted to Instagram, so if you’re on it you should totally follow me.

Assuming you have a secret desire for me to look at your photos and add inane commentary.

(You know you do.)

{ 67 comments… add one }

  • Sue at Naperville Now December 16, 2011, 8:06 am

    best.birthday presents. ever.

  • Bodaciousboomer December 16, 2011, 1:41 pm

    Happy belated BD kiddo. Mine was this past Monday. We’re both Sagittarians. No wonder we’re so great!

  • Elisabeth Treble December 16, 2011, 7:09 pm

    So, true story: I’m Mormon (just the normal kind, not the creepy weird kind. One husband is enough for me and I’m enough for him) and Husband and I were hanging out a our friends’ house (they’re mormon, too.) A third person came over with their little brother to say hi. Apparently, after they left, this little brother asked his sister if my husband and I lived with our friends and their four (soon to be five!) kids. As you may guess, many jokes about getting our own television series ensued.

    And PS Happy birthday! :)

  • Nami December 16, 2011, 10:56 pm

    My guess was: “I’m gorging this.” I don’t know why – perhaps because it was on underwear? Yeah, still a mystery – like baby stealing midgets…or was he a dwarf?

  • Kathy December 17, 2011, 6:33 pm

    Happy Birthday!! I love the card, very cute! Hope you had a great day and wishing you much happiness this next year!!

  • alonewithcats December 18, 2011, 7:13 pm

    My cat would look fabulous in that underwear.

    P.S. Jewish lesbian hasn’t mailed your gift yet, but you’ll get it before your next birthday. Maybe.

  • Kid In The Front Row December 19, 2011, 5:54 am

    You always focus on the little things.

    Which are the best things.

  • Kristina P. December 19, 2011, 4:17 pm

    That card is awesome. I hope people would want to be sister wives with me.

  • Not a Perfect Mom December 20, 2011, 8:03 pm

    I beg to differ…I too have given much thought to the sister wives issue, and I think first is the best wife…
    you have authority over all the other wives, your husband always wants to lay with the younger prettier wives, and then he feels so guilty you get the big house up on the hill overlooking the river with your kids and your favorite sister wife and her kids…
    Just sayin

  • Darcie (My Modern Country) December 20, 2011, 9:30 pm

    Gosh, I’m behind on blog stalking. Actually, I’m behind on EVERYTHING. Happy belated birthday! Love the undies. And the sister wives, I think I agree with Not A Perfect Mom. First is best.

  • erica December 20, 2011, 10:11 pm

    It’s been FOREVER since I’ve visited you here! Love the look! Of course, I am comment #61, so you will probably never read this.

  • Skye December 28, 2011, 4:48 pm

    Good thing you ended up getting a private island for Christmas!

    What? You meant a real island, not a board game? You only children are so spoiled!

    • Megan December 28, 2011, 9:15 pm

      Well, you know, our generation…

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